You gotta make room…

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Hey you beautiful souls!
So I have been in Charlotte North Carolina for 10 days now! It is so exciting to see how far the Father has brought me these last 7 months. Honestly it blows me away how the Father has worked in me these last months but more so I feel like He has been speaking so much to me in the last 10 days! I am super excited to share this next little tid bit with you all! I’m just so blown away by how when you take away the distractions, sit and listen to what He wants to say… oh my goodness y’all! HE SPEAKS SO LOUDLY WHEN YOU’RE WILLING TO LISTEN!
So I am sure all of you have prayed about something you desire in your life whether it be a wife or husband, a job promotion, a child, or maybe some type of dream that you have. We all have prayed about something we desire. There have been plenty of stories in the bible of people crying out to God for something to happen like in 1 Kings 17:21-22 says “Then he stretched himself upon the child three times and cried to the Lord, ‘O Lord my God, let this child’s life come into him again.’ And the Lord listened to the voice of Elijah. And the life of the child came into him again, and he revived.” Also there have been several stories of barren women praying for a child like in 1 Samuel 1&2 Hannah desperately wanted a child. Hannah cried out to God in such a raw, emotional way that the priest who heard her prayers actually thought that she was drunk. But she wasn’t. She was desperate, and she knew that the only one with the power to give her the desire of her heart was the Lord. God heard Hannah and her prayer touched the Lord so much that He was moved to give her a child. As promised, Hannah gave her child back to the Lord and Samuel went on to be a prophet. But my friend and I were talking about a chapter in Isaiah where Jesus says, “Sing, barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband,” says the Lord. (Isaiah 54:1)
WOW! God tells her to sing, burst into song and shout for joy. Why do you think He wants her to be joyful? It’s because He says that she will have many children, in fact He says she will have more children than a woman who has a husband. I don’t know about you but I had to go back and read that like 5 times. I questioned this and wondered, wait how can she have more children than a woman who has a husband? That’s why in verse 5 it says, “For your Maker is your husband, the Lord Almighty is his name, the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.” So God is her husband. She can’t be fruitful by herself, it is only when God blesses her that she becomes very fruitful with so many children. I wanna take a look at verse 2 though. It says, “Enlarge the place of your tent, stretch your tent curtains wide, do not hold back; lengthen your cords, strengthen your stakes.” (Isaiah 54:2)
I love the way the NLT translates it. It says, “Enlarge your house; build an addition. Spread out your home, and spare no expense!” I don’t know about you but if I wasn’t able to have children and someone told me to expand my house cause I’m going to have a bunch of children I would probably not spend a bunch of money on something that I knew wasn’t going to happen. (Even though that would be a big blessing and miracle and ya know my Daddy God is in the business of miracles, so He can do whatever the heck He wants to do! Plus He’s done it many times.)
Then Isaiah 54:3 says, “For you will soon be bursting at the seams. Your descendants will occupy other nations and resettle the ruined cities.”
What that meant was the gospel will be preached to all the nations and the kingdom of God will expand to the whole world. I love the way God uses different things to speak to us. He used this story to speak of Israel. So what I wanna focus on and what God so clearly spoke to me is in verse 2. “Enlarge your house; build an addition. Spread out your home, and spare no expense!”

Ohhh this is about to get so good! I don’t know if you are ready for this…
So like I said before, we all have prayed about something we desire. We all want more in our lives. But this is my question.
What if God gave that to you right when you prayed for it? I really want you to think about that.
STOP DO NOT READ THE NEXT SENTENCE.
What if God gave that to you right when you prayed for it?
I mean really..
Honestly I am sure all of you would say, “Well then I would be happy.” That’s not how it’s always supposed to be though. What if you’re not really ready for that blessing? What if that one thing you’ve always longed for came that easy? Yes, some prayers get answered immediately but I believe sometimes we have to first increase on the inside before the outside. I don’t know about you but I KNOW my God is in the business of BIG PLANS! I know that before God can give me something, He wants to prepare me for it. Kinda like in Isaiah 54. God said to the barren woman, to enlarge her house, TO MAKE ROOM for what was to come. We have to do that same thing. God wants to bless us beyond what we can imagine. He wants to give you the desires of your hearts. He wants to make your dreams come true. But if we aren’t really prepared for those blessings then we can’t really do with them what we are supposed to.
I want to share something personal God taught me while I was in college. Yay, story time. I hope you have already pulled up a chair. Okay so lets go back to 2010, I had been there for about 2 months at this time. So I remember I was sitting in my bed in my dorm just worshiping and journaling and I began crying. When I say crying I mean those ugly cries, it wasn’t cute at all. I remember just feeling so broken and wondered what was going on with me. I went to see one of my leaders in my dorm and poured out my heart and what had been going on with me. This part is something that has stuck with me through the last 7 years. She told me that my heart was like a house. I had let people in my house that shouldn’t have been allowed in. I allowed them to come and go as they pleased. It was like they came in and tore my home apart. The walls were completely damaged with dents and holes. The windows were shattered, all of the furniture was destroyed, and there were pieces that had been stolen, there wasn’t much left. Of course there were places in the house that were still a little beautiful but for the most part, it was damaged. She had told me she really wanted me to think and pray about this and see how God would speak to me. I never expected the next 3 or 4 hours to go like they did. God spoke so much truth, love, joy, and peace into me. He told me he wanted to make my house brand new. He said He would do the most amazing renovation. He took that house, flipped it upside down and made it brand new, just the way He wanted. He put up the most beautiful pictures, gave me the greatest furniture, the most beautiful flowers and gardens. One of the greatest things He did was put a beautiful white picket fence around my house with a lock and set of keys for only the people I wanted to come in. On the inside of the fence was a beautiful big tree and a swing hanging from it for the people who were allowed in my fence. He gave me the most beautiful home and the most beautiful description of my heart.
I don’t know how many of you have felt this way. Our hearts are like houses and we allow people in that shouldn’t be allowed in. We allow them to come and go as they please. They take whatever they want and honestly they probably don’t care if they have damaged it. But this is the thing, there is hope and He wants to heal your heart. He wants to do the most amazing renovation on you.
Another example would be: Lets say you have always dreamed of being a doctor, but you don’t wanna go to school for it, or halfway through school you drop out but you expect to be a doctor. Do you really think that would be okay for you to do heart surgery on someone? NO cause you aren’t prepared for that. Oh my goodness if that was even possible.. (that would be baddd)
Let’s not think about that “wanna be doctor” right now. I do know that things have happened since college and I allowed people to come back into my house and damage it, but He gave me the tools before to know exactly what I have to do for Him to make it like new.
I know that being 10 days into this move, God has been speaking so loudly. I am talking about louder than ever. He’s revealing things and teaching me things left and right. He’s supplying me with so much love, joy and peace. He’s in the process of healing me. It’s so crazy the way God works when we step out and are willing. I believe that He is making a way even when there seems to be no way. I see Him working in ways I never expected and He has given me so much love I can’t explain it.
So if you could only get one thing out of this I want you to know that before you can receive the blessing, you have to make room for it. You have to allow God to prepare you for it. Let Him heal those broken places. Let Him stretch you a little further. Let Him lead and guide you to the exact spot, the exact time, the exact thing He’s got in store. You do not want to prematurely get the blessing He has for you. Do not rush it.
I love you all and you aren’t in this alone. He has soooo much in store for your life. Just remember to make room. Empty out those things you really don’t need so He can replace it with amazing blessings.

Nevertheless… she persisted

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So it has been exactly 150 days since my last post and as many of you know from my last post that God called me to Elevation Church in Charlotte, North Carolina. He had never revealed a day or time or anything but I knew I was called to move. Well first I will say when God has a plan He will make a way. He mainly has asked me 2 things: trust Him no matter what and run after Him wholeheartedly. He said He would take care of the rest.
I visited North Carolina twice in the last 150 days. The first time I went it was so amazing I was filled with so much excitement and joy. I came home super excited looking for a job, still not sure of a day I would move, a place to live or really any details. But then a couple weeks later the enemy started coming against me, whispering things in my mind. I found my self in a place of questioning maybe this isn’t what God wants me to do, maybe He just wanted to see if I would do this or that, or whatever. You know how the enemy works, He will try any and everything to get us to NOT do what the Father calls us to. You know distractions from God are extremely dangerous.
It says in John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy. But i have come so that they may have an abundant life.”

The enemy HATES us! He wants nothing more than for us to doubt what God says. Did you just read that correctly? Yes! Let me say it again. He wants nothing more than for us to doubt what God says. This is a daily thing for us.

So after being distracted by the enemies lies, I decided again to go and visit Elevation because it was like I needed God to bring me back to that place of clarity, the place of remembering what HE wants and not what I want. So I began making plans to go visit again and it seemed as if everything was going perfectly. A week before I was gonna go to leave for Elevation I got a phone call from a guy that had been kind of trying to pursue me. He told me that He was going to Florida for a week and asked if I wanted to come visit him and his family for a few days after I left North Carolina. So I added that to my plans to just leave early from elevation and go visit. A week goes by and I was in North Carolina again, but it was like I wasn’t as excited as the first time, actually right when I got there, I was overcome with fear, loneliness, and so many emotions. My initial instinct should have been to pray. Thats not what I did. It was to call the guy that I had been talking to. I tried to get past everything I was feeling but I wasn’t going about it the right way. I had no clue why I was feeling the way that I was feeling. I mean when I look back I know that it was a way the enemy was trying to discourage me and make me not want to be EXACTLY where I needed to be. I ended up crying myself to sleep and when I woke up I called my mom and told her i wanted to leave, being the amazing mom that she is, she prayed for me. I called the guy I was talking to and told him how I was feeling and He told me I could just come early and spend more time with him and his family. So thats what I did. I drove 9 hours and finally met him and his dad. I was super happy and the time we had together was great. He asked me to be his girlfriend (which I definitely didn’t expect) and I said yes. This was my second distraction. I found myself in a relationship and spending the next month with him more than I ever expected. God wasn’t my priority and North Carolina just slipped right out of my mind, and my family was neglected, but most of all my relationship with God was suffering so much. I gave up what He continually put on my heart for a relationship that I knew deep down wasn’t the man God had for me. My relationship and this person were my focus. Every now and then I would wonder if I would have just listened to God? What if I wouldn’t have gotten into this relationship? What if I was already in Charlotte living out the callings God wants for me? What if this and what if that? But the enemy continually would speak lies into my ear. After that month I knew I wasn’t going to be able to see him for a bit of time because I had to get back to working and spending time with my family. What I truly needed was a wake up call and I am so thankful for my best friend and how transparent she is with me though. My family and my best friend all knew ultimately I wasn’t even happy. Of course my mom was continually praying for me and speaking goodness and truth into my life. The relationship wasn’t doing anything for me but sucking me dry, and everyone around me knew it. Really I was a broken mess and didn’t know what to do.

NO PERSON OR THING CAN TAKE THE PLACE OF GOD!!! I can say that again if you need me to. NO PERSON OR THING CAN TAKE THE PLACE OF GOD!!!

We live in a world of temporary fulfillment. We all were born with a God shaped hole in our hearts and nothing that we try to fill that void with will satisfy! Nothing but God can TRUELY satisfy us. We attempt to fill that void with everything from adrenalin rushing activities, to relationships, to careers, but in the end they just don’t satisfy. Don’t get me wrong for a time they are an enjoyment and we may even find ourselves content for a time but they still will end up leaving us empty. Thats exactly where I found myself. I gave every bit of me that I could to everything and everyone around me but I was no longer drawing from the one true source. The Father wasn’t filling me up any longer…not because He didn’t want to but because I WASN’T SEEKING HIM. I got lazy and complacent and ultimately selfish. It took me crying my eyes out in my bed wondering how I got to the place I was at. He revealed it right there, through a person that I never expected to say anything about God. I’ll say this, when God wants to speak He will use whoever or whatever to get to you. He revealed that I wasn’t a failure, that I didn’t mess up His plans He has for me, but instead I just delayed them. The Father spoke truth and so much love into me. As I sit here crying happy tears because The Father loves us so much. His love is unconditional and yes we fall, we fail, we make the wrong choices, but when we come to Him in full surrender, He grabs us up, wraps us in His big strong arms and gives us the most amazing hug. I know for me He shows His love in sooooo many ways. Through His word, through people, through situations, and so many other ways. So after a month of praying and seeking God endlessly I was able to end things with this person. It was a definite relief because I was so weak previously. When I surrendered the situation to the Father, He knew exactly what and who I needed in my life.

I can’t ever thank God enough for His faithfulness to us even when we aren’t faithful to Him. Its actually crazy to think about that. You know if you’re in a relationship and that person turns their back on you, yea you may fight for that person for a while but you’ll probably end up giving up. God won’t and never will give up on you. He will continually fight for you. He loves us so much. Goodness, does He. AHHH His love doesn’t compare to ANYTHING.

So the last 150 days have been amazing and not so amazing. The enemy has come at me so hard and He tried to distract me, he tried to kill me, he tried to change my plans. He thought he had me… oh but NOT TODAY SATAN! All I have to say to him is go to hell satan! Go back where you came from, YOU CAN’T HAVE ME! You can’t have my joy, you can’t have my life, you can’t have my family, you can’t have my friends, you can’t have anything! YOU CAN’T WIN!! I am a child of the most high! My daddy God reigns FOREVER! I am an overcomer!

So as you can see I may have been distracted for a month but God already knew what was gonna happen. He knows us better than we know ourselves. The Father grabbed hold of me and reminded me of the plans and promises He put in and on my life. He reminded me of what He has for me in North Carolina. He confirmed again that I was to go. He started opening up doors again for me and I couldn’t pass them up. I am so excited for what He’s doing in my life, and what He’s gonna do. I am so thankful for the amazing people He has placed in my life to give me what I never thought I would have. I have the most amazing friends who continually speak life into me. Friends that encourage me in a way that exemplifies the Father and His amazing unfailing love for us. I am so thankful and grateful how God has shown up and shown off over the course of my life but especially these last few months. He is teaching me so much.

One of the biggest things He has shown me would be:

  1. “Let go my soul and trust in Him” – I’m sure you all have heard the song, “It is well.” Some of the lyrics are: Through it all, through it all, My eyes are on You, Through it all, through it all, it is well, So let go my soul and trust in Him, The waves and wind still know His name, It is well with my soul.
    That is soooo incredible. Through it all, through everything that happens in our lives, through the pain of situations, through the choices that we make, HE IS CONSTANT first of all and second He loves us so much and wants nothing but the best for us. But when we surrender it, when we let go and give Him control and we trust in Him, He will take care of everything. Thats been one of the biggest things in my life. I try to control situations, I try to figure things out on my own. If you are like me, you know that we just crash and burn when we try to take things into our own hands. Thats what brings me to the second thing God has shown me.

2. Relationships: I know that until God makes it so evident to me, I am done dating. I’m putting this out there to say that I know God has my husband out there and the only way He’s going to get to me is through Jesus. I no longer hold onto my heart, God does. I know God has the most incredible man out there for me and I TRUST Him. I have no place to worry because He’s in complete control. I trust Him with all aspects of my life. For many years God has shown me and taught me things through past relationships and even friendships with guys. Of course as a 26 year old woman I long for marriage and family, but deep down I WANT GOD. I want what HE has for me. I know that my future relationship and marriage will be build upon Christ and His love will be on display. I know that will be a love that exemplifies His love for the Church. It will be a selfless love. I know that when I give, I will also receive. I know what I deserve. I know that God has nothing but the very best for me and I trust Him. Until then my amazing future husband, I’m waiting for you… I love you more than you’ll ever comprehend. I am praying for you right now. I am praying everyday! I pray right now that you are being molded and shaped into such a man of character and integrity. I pray that whatever season you are in, that you allow the Father to grow you and reveal Himself to you. I pray that He is creating in you everything you need to be for our future family. I pray that you are a pursuer of the presence of Christ, that in your stillness He would speak wisdom, discernment, and vision over your life so clearly. That He will raise you up to be a David, a spiritual leader for our home, loving as He loved the church. I’m so thankful for you and everything you will give me in the future. I pray that God is doing amazing things right now in your life. Thank you in advance for loving me the way the Father loves us. I already know you’re going to be everything I’ve ever ask for and more. I know God is doing amazing things in your life and He’s gonna do even more amazing things in the future. The Father blows me away every time I think of you. I know He’s been saving up His most wonderful son just for me. I know that before we were even born He thought of you when He made me and thought of me when He made you. I can’t wait to see that handsome smile of yours when you look me in the eyes and tell me I am the one you’ve always dreamed of. As much as I have wanted to plan my own life, I know that this life has a way of surprising us in ways that we could never imagine but that will be the moment when I know, that’s God’s will. I hope that by the time I find you, you are already in love. So madly, deeply, wildly in love as I am with the one who first loved us. I pray you have experienced His grace upon grace, and that it is that same love and that same grace that leads you to me. In His perfect timing we will come together. In His perfect timing I will have you by my side worshiping the Father together. Doing radical things for Jesus together, turning this world upside down for the glory of our Father! I love you my sweet sweet man. Love, your future wife.

3. STEP OUT AND LET GO OF FEAR! Whoa can I tell you God has continually revealed to me how much fear I call on myself. You may be sitting there thinking wow that’s sad, but its so true we all do it. When we say I’m scared to do that or oh thats my biggest fear. I know that God has revealed to me and confirmed it through some of my friends that we need to stop saying that. The words we speak hold life or death. We have to start speaking life. I am not afraid and I will not be afraid. I am going to step out in faith and do amazing things because God is by my side. I know God is challenging me to step out in faith and trust that He’s gonna be there through it all. Specially with this move in front of me. I am going into a new place, with new people, and new adventures to be had. I am super excited to see what the Father is going to do in this new season of trusting Him and using bold faith. I am not saying no to God but instead stepping up and saying YES GOD! It’s time for the radical. I know He is challenging me to do a lot right now. (That will come in more blog posts!) I hope you will come back to hear about those things!!!

So as I sit here 24 days away from moving and thinking about everything I have experienced over the last 150 days since writing my last post. I do get emotional because I ask myself why did I allow myself to get distracted? Why did I make the decisions I did? Why wasn’t I strong enough? What got me to the places I got to?

Honestly its foolish for me to sit here and dwell on those things. Instead, I know that those things were all a lesson. We have to grow through what we go through. Yes all of our decisions affect us, but what are you gonna do with that? You have to decide what your next move is gonna be. Honestly I feel like God allows us to go through certain situations to show us that we really truly aren’t in control but instead He is. That we can’t do this life alone! He is the one who sustains us. We are nothing without Him. We really truly can’t survive without Him. He is like the air we need to breathe.

So I have given God complete control and I know that He has already done so much and I’ve been experiencing Him in amazing new ways. I am experiencing His love in new ways. It’s so amazing what He does when you give Him back the control. I am so excited to see what He’s going to do in this next season. I am excited to see the ways He is going to move in me and through me. I am so excited to see how He’s going to provide physically, spiritually, financially, and emotionally. He’s always been so faithful. It blows my mind really.

So I wanna say He’s not done with you. Nothing that you have done will EVER stop Him from loving you. It’s not too late. No matter how many times we mess up He’s always there to pick us up, wipe off the dirt, and make us whole. He has always done it for me. God has taken our broken pieces and made us whole. He’s our creator, we are the clay in the potters hands. Are you going to let Him mold you and shape you? We can’t do this life without Him. We may think we can, but we will crash and burn every time. He loves you so much, He longs for you. You are so beyond precious to the Father!

Thank you so much for reading this post. I am praying for all of you that are reading this. I am so thankful to have this opportunity to share my life and to speak life into yours. Please be praying for me as well. Have an amazing day and know that GOD IS NOT FINISHED WITH YOU!

 

I HAVE HUGE NEWS!!!!!

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Okay seriously!!!!!

T W E N T Y S E V E N T E E N

We are 17 days into this year and you have been nothing but a rollercoaster… OH MY GOSH! It’s not a terrible thing… actually God is seriously doing soooo much and I can’t be more excited for all the amazing things He’s already done and brought me through, but I’m super excited for what is about to come!

Actually I am SOOOOO excited and so blown away by what He’s about to do. I mean the last 21 months have been pretty crazy and amazing and I believe that this time and everything that did happen was preparing me for what is to come. I believe that The Father has put amazing dreams, goals, and callings on my life and im sooooo stinkin ready for what He’s prepared me for. Okayyyy I know you’re wondering what I am talking about.. I mean honestly I wanna know what I’m talking about hahaha.. Y’all!!!! Oh my gosh, its kinda scary.

IT’S PRETTY SCARY ACTUALLY… but I aint scared of NOTHINGGGG!!!

I seriously have been trying to figure out how to even think straight. I just keep laughing and trying to even put into words what I am feeling… but I can’t. I seriously have been trying to put into words what’s on my heart and mind for the last 20 hours!!!! I found myself rambling on and on when I was telling my friend about everything He put on my heart.

Are you feeling the suspense? Do you wanna know what it is He’s put on my heart? Hahaha I’m seriously laughing just typing this.

I’m getting that giddy feeling in my tummy and all excited. Okay okay okay, I’ll start by saying if you have either followed my blog, instagram, or personally know me, you know that April 20th 2015 I decided that I didn’t like the way my life was going, so I changed it. I surrendered everything and oh my goodness God completely blew my mind. My relationship with God skyrocketed, I thought my relationship with God was great before I started, but can I tell you HE BLEW MY MIND. I lost a bunch of weight, He shaped me, molded me, and taught me so many amazing things that I’m soooo beyond thankful for. One of the biggest things God did was introduce me to Elevation church and Steven Furtick. I remember being on facebook one day and one of my friends posted a link for one of His messages called “creating separation” it was part of a series called Stretch marks and can I tell you I’ve probably watched that message 10 times since 21 months ago. That message really helped me realize so much, but God opened a door and that door swung straight open. I have watched every single message since then. The Father has spoke through Pastor Steven and his wife Holly every single week. I feel so blessed to experience the heart of the church and my amazing Father God speak straight to me through an amazing Pastor right on my TV, phone, computer, but really where my heart would love to be is in that church.

I’m pretty sure you are getting what has been on my heart. Spiritually, physically, and emotionally God has completely transformed me. So, the last 21 months God has been preparing me for what is to come.

I feel like there is so much that God has instilled inside of me. I know that I have a heart for worship; I started leading worship when I was 14 or 15 years old. I love that the Father chose to give me a voice to not only worship Him by myself but to lead others into His presence! Seriously it’s a HUGE privilege to give others the opportunity to worship our Father God and experience His love, mercy, grace, and presence!! AHHH I’m getting chills just thinking about it. I honestly have a huge heart for people! I love people so much and want nothing but Gods very best for everyone.

My momma has always told me, “You can’t save everyone.” Actually I can’t save anyone, but I can share the Fathers love, grace, mercy, and everything He’s instilled in me to lead them to Jesus! Ahhh Sharing Jesus with others is such a fulfilling thing.

I’ll tell you something though. I am great speaking to a few people at a time but I am soooooo scared to talk in front of a lot of people. Seriously, I get so nervous, my mouth gets dry, I get red haha its not fun to watch. That’s why I know that the thing that scares me most is how the Father is going to use me the greatest. That’s right! I know the Father has called me to speak. My heart just started racing typing that. Yeah my whole insides are screaming in fear but guess what???

THERE ISN’T ANY FEAR WITH GOD!!!

Nope!

I know He has the most amazing callings and plans for my life and I don’t wanna just talk about it anymore. I constantly talk about how I want God to use me and how I want to be involved more in the young adults and youth. How I want to be surrounded by more people that are as passionate as I am about Jesus and loving His people. These are my desires! I have such a heart and passion for God’s people that all I wanna do is be on the mission field. So in saying that, I feel extremely called to be a part of Elevation and get really involved in their ministry.

So what all this comes down to is I’m done talking about it. I’m putting in action! God has put the most amazing dreams and callings in my heart, and I am more than ready to experience this next season of my life. I know that God doesn’t call the qualified, but he qualifies the called. I also know that He calls the willing. I really feel called to be involved with the young adults and youth. I know that if God leads me to do worship in some form there, I would be totally down. I don’t want to do anything out of my own will but whatever the Fathers will and plan is. I told my best friend at the beginning of this year that this year was going to be completely different, that this year the people who were willing and truly desired God to move will see Him move. I prayed that our eyes and ears would be open to the Father. To hear, see, and even taste the goodness of our Father God. It just amazes me how when we are willing, we truly see and hear God so clearly. We have to remember to shut off the world. It’s not mans approval that we need, but Gods! Nothing in this world will satisfy us or give us a lasting fulfillment. It’s all temporary. I don’t want to live for the temporary. I want to live for the eternal and I want OTHERS to have that same experience! I want them to feel the Fathers love, I want them to experience the goodness of Him, His mercy, His grace, and then to be able to share with others what He’s done in them. I want them to know that nothing that has happened in the past will change the way the Father loves them. He’s our FATHER! All He wants is the very best for us.

I know that through these next few months the Father will guide my footsteps. I know that He will lead me in what direction I will take. I know that when God has a plan He will make a way. I trust that He will open doors for me that NO MAN CAN SHUT! I am trusting Him in all that I do.

If you read all of this, thank you for reading. Please please please pray for me! I don’t want to do any of this out of selfish ambition. I want the Father to guide me in His perfect will and plan for my life.

So here’s to the next few months and seeing what the Father does!!

NORTH CAROLINA HERE I COME!!!

YAY SOOOO EXCITED!!!

Also if you are currently at elevation, LETS CONNECT!!! I literately know NOBODY there sooooo it would be great to begin this amazing journey. So here it is… this is taking lots of FAITH! But hey I trust HIM!!!

lets be honest…

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So its been almost a year since I’ve posted anything. I’ll say I am so sorry I disappeared on everyone. I can honestly say that the last year of my life has been quite a journey. A lot has happened good and bad, but the one thing that hasn’t changed is God. Am I right?

Malachi 3:6 says, “I the Lord do not change…”

Hebrews 13:8 says, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”

Isaiah 40:28 says, “ Have you not known? Have you not heard? The God Who lives forever is the Lord, the One Who made the ends of the earth. He will not become weak or tired. His understanding is too great for us to begin to know.”

There it is, the proof. He has not and will not change. He’s a constant God, everlasting, He’s always there. He has and will never leave us!

I’ve experienced a lot in the past year and honestly my faith has been tested. I mean I know we all go through things and we feel like we are about to break but I can honestly say I was in that place. It’s not a fun place to be and to go through everything I did and be where I am today, I have to give God all the credit. I know that God promises to make something good out of the storms that bring devastation to our lives. I don’t think I have given God all the credit He deserves. I know that I should be thanking Him constantly for His grace, mercy, His goodness!

I think the biggest thing that I learned over the last year of my life has been THE DEVIL HATES ME AND WANTS ME TO FAIL AS MISERABLY AS POSSIBLE. I’ve learned that without God as number one we will fail. I know that I allowed things to get in the way of my relationship with God. I allowed myself to be distracted by life, work, relationships, even friendships, and loss. I know that we have to remember where our priorities truly are and where they should be.

  1. GOD FIRST ALWAYS
  2. LOVE YOURSELF (most definitely something I’m working on)
  3. LOVE OTHERS LIKE GOD LOVES US

Jeremiah 33:3 says, “‘Call to Me, and I will answer you. And I will show you great and wonderful things which you do not know.”

And that’s what I did and am constantly doing. I’m calling out to God and giving Him the time He deserves. Without God we are NOTHING! I know that when my relationship with God isn’t where it needs to be I am not who I need to be. I lack so much when I’m not close to God. He is my everything and will always be. I know that I truly want the fullness of Christ. So that means we need to have a true RELATIONSHIP with Christ. I’ve said this before in one of my previous post but when you get married you don’t stop communicating with your spouse. You don’t wanna stop learning about them. You wanna know everything about them, you wanna spend tine with them and love on them, you want to have those intimate moments with them. God wants the same thing with us. He wants a PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP with us. He wants to hear from us. Prayer changes everything. Don’t be anxious, but instead pray. If God is for us, who can be against us? His grace is sufficient.

All this to say… I want to be the pencil in Gods hand. I want Him to mold me, shape me, and make me exactly who He has called me to be. He will as long as we are willing so that’s what I am going to do. A lot is changing and will be changing because I want to be the best version of me possible.

Thanks for reading my little spiel, but I just wanted to be honest and let you know that none of us are perfect and we all fall sometimes, we all get off track sometimes. BUTTTT its never too late and you can always come back. There’s always room to grow so ill take that right there and run with it.

I love you all and I pray that you all have the most amazing day!

 

 

 

D-E-C-I-D-E

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Let me ask you this.. Have you ever had this thought?

I just don’t feel like myself at all. It’s like this switch flipped and I don’t even know who I am. I allowed one thing to come into my life and now I feel like it has completely overtaken me. I feel lost like a child who can’t find their parents. Wanting nothing more than to find them. Crying uncontrollably, asking for help, sitting in a corner, scared of what will happen or who will try to talk to you. I don’t want to feel like this. I just want to be home, safe with my family again.

Now this isn’t literal obviously because we’re not children. But have you found yourself in a place where you can’t find God? You feel like you’re so lost you won’t ever find your way back home? Like you’ll never feel His presence again.

Most of us don’t ask ourselves this question though.

Let me step back and see what it is that has actually brought me to this place.

The enemy hates our guts. He will do anything to trip us up, make us stumble and fall and he wants us to die a slow painful death. I am well aware of this and hate it with everything inside of me but at the same time I love it because I know that Daddy God has a HUGE plan for our life. What we have to realize is that the enemy doesn’t want the plan that God has for us to come to pass. Me writing this is something the enemy doesn’t want. I know for myself that Daddy God has me in a season of encouraging, inspiring, and showing Jesus to the world. Do you really think the enemy wants me to do that? Heck no! He wants me to fail in every way possible.

Let me open your eyes for a moment.

The enemy uses the same tactics he has always used and he is going to continue using them over and over and over again. If it were me I mean, I would at least switch it up every other time. So the things we either struggle with or have struggled with.. he’s going to keep using those things to trip us up.

He is an IDIOT! Yet.. kinda smart. (no I don’t applaud the enemy)

I know you’re thinking why would the enemy use the same “game plan” every time?

I mean imagine what football would be like if one of the teams playing used the same game plan every time. You know you wouldn’t enjoy watching it anymore. The other teams they play would always win because if they’re using the same game plan the other team would always know exactly how to beat them.

Well the enemy does the same thing. But do you really know why he does that? It’s because it’s what has always worked for him. We somehow find ourselves in a place we never expected. But it is our job not to continue falling. We all know that we have been tempted and we win some and we lose some.

I mean me, I want to win!

We don’t live our lives saying okay let’s just fall at every temptation that comes our way. I mean true followers of Christ don’t intentionally want to live a life completely rebellious to God.

I want to live a life glorifying His name in every single way possible. I want to shine the light of Jesus everywhere I go.

Matthew 5:14-15 “You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house.

Imagine this:

We’re buzzing along living life just fine, resisting, resisting, resisting, and then.. BOOM!!! Temptation hits and you believe you’re strong enough, nah you won’t fall.. we are sure of it, but then we do. We fell… Ughhh.. why??

What comes next?

After the fall comes that inevitable season of regret, we beat ourselves up and commit to never fall again. But we feel so defeated, like why couldn’t we just be strong enough?

1 Corinthians 10:13 No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.

The key is don’t let this get you down. That’s exactly what the enemy wants. He wants you to be in a place of regret, unforgiveness, fear, anxiety, he wants you to believe that you can’t be forgiven for falling. He wants you to sulk in the regret and guilt of falling.

We can’t allow the enemies lies to cloud what The Father says.

Romans 8:1-2  So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.  

No temptation will overtake us if we allow God to take control of it. When we make mistakes don’t beat yourself up brush off the dust God will meet you there.

You might find yourself in a place where you have fallen and just like the Life Alert commercial.. You can’t get up lol (I had to use that) When you find yourself controlled by a sin, it forms these chains of bondage. This is a place I have been and only God can free you from it. No matter what you try to get out of it on your own, it won’t leave.

When you’re in bondage it’s like sitting in a chair with ropes tied around you. It seems like there’s no way to get out. No matter how hard you try. You’re stuck.

But there is a way out! You can break free with God’s help. No, you don’t have the strength to do it yourself (I’ve tried), but Daddy God is more than powerful enough to set you free my dear. All you have to do is surrender yourself to Him. When you do that, He can in one fell swoop can remove everything that was tying you down.

EVERYTHING

He will replace all of that stuff with freedom. True freedom!

You have to choose though. Do you truly want to live in freedom? We can’t do this in a half-hearted “wish I could change” kind of attitude. We have to be all in or not at all.

D-E-C-I-D-E

Yea that five letter word actually holds a LOT of power. You have the choice. Once this decision is truly made, the Spirit of God will overtake you and do all the work behind the scenes. All you have to do is surrender, submit to His plan, His will no matter how hard that is, and watch those chains break and fall off of you.

It will be a thing of the past, no longer a thing of the present, all gone just like God said he would tie it to a rock and throw it to the bottom of the ocean, All gone!

God calls us to live in complete and total freedom. what do you decide?

Isaiah 40:29-31 He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.

YOU ARE AN OVERCOMER

❤ I love you all!

divine appointments…

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Good Afternoon you beautiful souls.

I want to start this post off with a verse thats been on my mind and heart lately.

It’s says in Jeremiah 29:11-14 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the Lord. “I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land.”

It doesn’t say He will make you suffer forever and ever. He doesn’t say I don’t care about you. He doesn’t say you’re never gonna make it out of that place you’re in.

NO!!!

No matter what it is you’re going through! Jesus tells us I have such an amazing plan for your life. I have a future that is sooooo good for you! I have plans for you that will prosper you. He will restore what you have lost, He will replace your sorrow with joy, He will fill your heart with so much love and peace, that it will overflow.

He says if you look for me I will meet you there. Daddy God is a gentleman, He’s not gonna push you into doing something. He’s going to stand at the door and knock. He will be there waiting for you. When we call on Him, He will come.

We need to pray pray pray! Prayer isn’t about some formal traditional thing that we do. It’s a direct line to our Daddy God and Jesus. YES! Seriously, I think a lot of people don’t grasp that. He wants a personal relationship with us. The way I think about it, it’s like a marriage. We don’t marry this person we are so in love with and stop talking to them. We want to pursue that person, am I right?

YES! Of course!

You wouldn’t marry someone and then turn around and start looking for someone else to love you, would you? I would hope not! We are devoted to that person, desiring to know them more and more each day. We would long to love that person and show them how important they are. I know I would want to give that person all the time I could give to let them know that they are so loved. I would want to continue learning about that person.

So why would we commit our hearts to Jesus and then just walk away and try to fill ourselves with all the crap (sorry momma I know you don’t like that word) this world is offering you? When we take time out of our day to talk to Jesus, to learn about Him and all that He has for you, you will grow. You will see a difference in all areas of your life. When you go deeper into a real relationship with Jesus, He will blow your mind.

God is love and through prayers we experience and understand the love of Jesus. When we pray we are entering into the presence of God, He likes to wrap us in His love. And oh it’s such an amazing and beautiful thing. He builds up our faith and strengthens us.

It still blows my mind how amazing our creator is and what we desire is really what He desires. Love, affection, conversation, intimate moments knowing we are the most important person in front of them. He desires a personal relationship with us.

This past weekend my pastor talked about the importance of time, in a message called “Taking Control of Our Time.” Time is our most precious commodity and everyone starts the day with the same amount. How we manage our time really does tie in with our relationship with Jesus. We have to examine our lives and see what our true priorities are. We have to find a balance in our lives and know that when you put God first, everything else will fall into place.

Goshhhh!!! This gets me so excited and pumped and makes me wanna spend so much time with Him. To know that our creator, the big man, the ONE who created the world and everything in it, wants us more than anything!

Now I have to ask a question. I want you to really dig deep and ask yourself. What is holding you back from your relationship with Jesus? What are your priorities?

Praying daily must be a top priority in our walk with the Father. Think of it this way. Just like we need water to survive, its the same with prayer. Ceasing to pray is like ceasing to drink water. They are both life sources. Prayer is so powerful and can change anything according to the will of the Father.

Start today! God is going to do abundantly more than you could ever imagine in your life. I’m praying for you, everyone of you that reads this. Have a blessed day and know that you are so loved and important!

change my heart why dont ya…

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Hey you beautiful soul!

Today is such a wonderful day… because I am writing, and sharing the love of Jesus makes me happy!

So I’m sitting here at work and decided I wanted to share a little bit of what God has been sharing with me lately. I went to go pick up my bible this morning to bring to work with me and dropped it.. Opps! When i looked down this was the verse that was highlighted on the page it was opened to.

“My God shall supply ALL YOUR NEEDS according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19

I love when God has crazy amazing ways of telling me something. It reminds me that He’s always with me and never far. He’s always close by and even when we don’t know that we need something He has a way of telling the exact things we need at the perfect time.

So what this verse brought out of me is something that I’ve had a deep deep emotional connection to. Something that i didn’t fully understand or realize till God brought me to a place of seclusion. I know that i hate being in a place like that, but thats the times that God does the most amazing things, IF YOU ALLOW HIM.

So today I am going to lay everything out so you can see a little bit more of who I am, and what I’ve been through. I know a lot of people have looked at me and said, “Wow, you have everything together Samantha, you seem like you have the most perfect relationship with Jesus and you don’t have any distractions in your life. You don’t need a man to complete you, I wish I was more like that.”

Well i have some bad news for those people. I don’t have everything together, I’m a mess, haha. I am nowhere near perfect and just like so many other people, I long for a soulmate. I have a deep desire inside of me to be married and have a family. Okay so I’m gonna take you back to when I was a child.

As a little girl, I dreamed of my wedding day. Every little detail was planned out and it was PERFECT! I mean really, every little girl dreamed of there wedding day. As i grew up i still dreamed of this day, but it was more like I enjoyed the attention I received from the guys. I guess it was somewhere towards the end of middle school when i became obsessed with boys. I would find so many boys cute and there became my introduction to crushes. I wanted to be liked, wanted, and pretty. I wanted a boyfriend! I wasn’t allowed to date but, that didn’t stop me. I started dating boys, not like we would be able to go anywhere alone because I wasn’t allowed to date. I got sneaky, bought a phone and would talk to a bunch of guys. Something clicked inside of me and there began my obsession with wanting to be wanted and loved. But really God created a void in your heart that is only His to fill. I thought that I knew God’s love, but i see now I didn’t truly know it. Lets skip ahead… after went through some really rough trials in my life i found myself before God but I never completely surrendered guys to God. I told people I wasn’t worried about guys and that i didn’t need a man to complete me. I even fooled myself but no matter how much I tried to tell myself I didn’t need a man to complete me, I found myself searching for something more. Whenever i thought i was fully surrendering i would find myself coming back to that need for love. I found myself in relationships with men I knew I wouldn’t marry but they wanted me so I had to try to change them into the man I wanted. I wasted so much time trying to search for something that was always there. GOD! After releasing myself from my last relationship in January, i decided that i was no longer was searching. I decided i was going to trust God fully with my heart. The happily-ever-after i always longed for was right in front of me. I know that i was created by God and for God, and our purpose in life is to glorify Him.

The only one who can satisfy the human heart is the One who created it. When life becomes meaningless, boring, and hard it’s because we’ve been filling it with anything but Him.

I am beyond thankful that I finally allowed God to fill me. God has drastically changed my heart since obeying his call to surrender relationships to him. I haven’t had any desire to search for anything other than more of Jesus. No i’m nowhere near perfect but I am beyond grateful that I decided to completely surrender relationships to Jesus. I know that He is doing things in my life I’ve never experienced before. I am becoming more and more of the woman the Father has called me to be, and i know when I least expect it my husband will come along and God will say hey.. That’s him.

That will be one of the most amazing days of my life.. But till then I’m gonna keep running after Jesus at full speed, giving my family the time they deserve, and keep striving to be the “The One” for my future husband.

I pray y’all have a blessed day

If you ever wanna talk don’t hesitate to contact me. I’m always here for anyone that needs me.